


Dates and Fries

by clumsyghost



Category: Night at the Museum (Movies)
Genre: Human AU, M/M, Waiter AU, slight angst with a happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-25
Updated: 2020-01-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:29:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22408714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clumsyghost/pseuds/clumsyghost
Relationships: Jedediah & Octavius (Night at the Museum), Jedediah/Octavius (Night at the Museum)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 113





	1. Chapter 1

Larry owed him. Jedediah didn’t know what he had been thinking, agreeing to cover Larry’s server shift on a Friday night. The restaurant had been slammed since five and he hadn’t had a break since. The tips were good, but the crowd wasn’t showing any signs of slowing yet. Out of the corner of his eye, Jed watched the hostess seat his latest customer at a table that he swore was still dirty just a second ago. One thing for sure, the bussing service had stepped up their game since he last officially worked here. 

Jed left the six-top and sauntered up to the man, tucking his notepad into his pocket. “Howdy. My name’s Jed and I’ll be yer server this evening. What kinda drink can I wrangle up for ya?”

Brown eyes lifted from the menu and lingered on his name tag, which decidedly spelled “Larry,” wary skepticism written all over his face.

“Water,” the man replied. Then, almost an afterthought. “Please.”

His accent was almost as cute as he was. Not that Jed was about to say so. “One tall drink of water it is. Waitin’ on someone?” Jed nodded towards the empty seat and the second menu on the table. “Do you know what they’ll be wanting?"

“No,” came the terse reply. The man’s attention fixed back on the menu as if he was willing Jed away. Jed did not take the hint.

“Oh. First date, then, is it?” That got a reaction, a big ol’ red one across his tanned face. “Be right back with your water,” Jed sang out.

He brought Brown Eyes his water then delivered Table Four their food. He kept an eye out as he took Table Five’s orders, but no one was joining the single man in the corner. He gave it another five more minutes before returning to the table.

“Can I get you anything while you’re waitin’? Jed tapped his foot impatiently. Table hoggers were one thing, but most at least ordered somethin’! Unfortunately, Brown Eyes just shook his head.

After that, Jed purposely ignored him, giving all his attention to the rest of his customers. It wasn’t until everyone else's food had been delivered and a few bills collected before he moseyed back over. The man was no longer staring at his phone. In fact, his phone had been put away. A good thing too, for Jed refilled the empty water glass with less than stellar aim. The pitcher was placed onto the table as Jed whipped out his notepad, pen hovering.

“I am sorry for holding up the table and your time,” the man spoke levelly. “I’m afraid I have to leave, though.” 

“What? Did something happen?” Jed raised a brow.

“I’m not sure how that’s any of your business,” his customer replied testily. “I… I will cover your tip, of course....”

Jed watched the man reach for his wallet, putting two and two together to make it absolutely his business. “Ya got ditched, didn’t you? That’s no fun.” He tapped his chin with the end of the pen. “Hm. Well, you’ve been here this long, a few more minutes won’t matter. Just wait there. I got an order of fries in.”

“Excuse me?” His words were in vain, spoken to the air, as the server was gone. Jed returned a few minutes later, bearing the most overfilled basket of french fries he had ever seen. They weren’t just plain fries either, oh no, here was a greasy mess of melted cheese, bacon pieces, and what he was pretty sure was the entire restaurant’s supply of jalapenos.

“Here. Fresh as it gets.” Jed dropped the basket on the table and slid in the booth opposite. “What’s yer name, if ya don’t mind me askin’?”

“Octavius,” the man replied reluctantly. He watched Jed pull a few fries out with his fingers. Octavius pointedly unwrapped his silverware and readied his fork.

“Nice to meet you again. I’m Jed, if you don’t recall.”

“Not Larry?” Octavius’ lips curled into a faint smile. “Aren’t you… working right now?”

“Went on break. My last table didn’t order anythin’,” Jed replied with a smirk. He reached for and held up a bottle of hot sauce. “Can you handle this?”

“Of course.” Octavius speared a fry and ate it as he watched the blond splatter hot sauce over the basket. He supposed this was no different than a first date meeting, but it still felt odd. “Not a salad fan, I take it.”

“Hey now. Ol’ Jedediah eats plenty of rabbit food. But nothing beats hot cheese and bacon for a heartbreak.”

“Did you say heartbreak or heartburn?” Octavius huffed lightly. “And I’m far from heartbroken, thank you.”

“That’s ‘cause you got the hot cheese!” Jed gestured towards the basket.

“Whatever you say…. You know, a real waiter would have brought us plates.” Octavius wiped up a spot of hot sauce that had dripped onto the table with his napkin. “Who is Larry, anyway?”

“A real customer would eat with their fingers.” Jed waved his sauce-stained fingers. “Mmm. Larry’s a friend of mine. He had an interview over at the museum and couldn’t find anyone to cover for him, so I decided to do him a favor. He’s got a kid and all, and I used to work here too, so… you know… just helping out.”

“That’s nice of you.” Octavius smiled.

“Naw. I’m taking ten percent for the trouble.” Jed shifted and pulled out his phone to check the time. “Speaking of ten, my break’s up. You go ahead and finish these up, okay?”

When Jed stopped by later to help the busser clean, he found a tip and the man’s phone number left beside the empty basket.


	2. Chapter 2

Karaoke night at his favorite bar. This should be the highlight of his week, but Octavius’ friends had had to practically drag him there. After the dating disaster of the previous week, he wasn’t feeling confident in regards to his social life. Octavius finally gave in just to put an end to his friends’ lectures and incessant whining.

He had been sitting at their table, nursing his drink for a little under an hour when the third set changed. The announcer got on his microphone and said something about _The Cowboys_ , but Octavius wasn’t paying attention until the band members arrived on stage. His shaggy blond hair was partly hidden by a black cowboy hat, but Octavius instantly recognized the man carrying a guitar case. Jed.

‘ _Don’t look over here. Don’t look over here. Don’t look over here_.’ Octavius pleaded internally. Why did Tony have to pick a table so close to the performers? ‘ _Don’t look over here. Don’t… oh gods, he’s looking over here_.’

Sure enough, those bright blue eyes were staring right at him. Jed tipped his hat towards the table as he removed the guitar from its case. Octavius groaned.

“Who is that?” Ahkmenrah lifted his hand briefly in reply.

“Just a waiter I met last week. The night I got stood up,” Octavius elaborated reluctantly. He toyed with his straw and avoided further eye contact with the singer.

“He’s cute.” Marcus raised a brow at his friend’s shrug. “Exactly your type, if I’m not mistaken.”

“Apparently I’m not his,” Octavius replied shortly. He didn’t want to mention how he had waited all night for a text or a call from an unknown number. His disappointment was easily waved aside, chiding himself for not taking into account Jed’s tiredness from work. The next day found him just as hopeful. By the fourth day with no contact, all he felt was embarrassment. Obviously he had mistaken the man’s friendliness as interest. Rejected twice the same night. That had to be a record. Jupiter above, was he so terrible at reading people?

He should not feel so awkward. He had just as much right to be here as Jed. Ignoring the stage, Octavius focused on his friends’ conversation and not the way Jed’s fingers moved over the strings of the guitar as the band warmed up. Then Jed began to sing, and Octavius lost all pretense of indifference. It was a country song, one Octavius wasn’t familiar with, but it suited Jed’s voice. The lyrics came out warm and strong, lit with a soft wistfulness here and there. Jed wasn’t the best singer Octavius had heard, but his voice was certainly pleasant to listen to.

“Who wants to hear another?” Jed asked as the song came to an end. There was an answering murmur from the crowd, which evidently wasn’t enough for Jed, who shot back with a, “I can’t hear you!”

Jed continued to hype up the crowd, winking saucily at Octavius as he caught the man’s gaze. Octavius shook his head and stifled a smile. Jed’s antics were entertaining, but talk about mixed signals... He watched the singer closely, but Jed did not make eyes at anyone else in the crowd.

The band played two more songs before they stepped aside for someone else. Octavius found himself half hoping, half dreading the thought that Jed may approach him. A few people surrounded the musicians, and so Octavius once more turned his attention back to the table. He didn’t have long to catch up with the conversation before a voice cut into a lull.

“Howdy.” 

Octavius looked up. Jed, empty-handed, fellow band members nowhere to be seen. Octavius took a large sip of his drink.

“I need to use the restroom.” Ahk stood up.

“Gonna order another drink,” Marcus declared.

“Need to take this phone call.” Tony held up his phone which was clearly not ringing.

“Are your friends alright?” Jed asked as the three fled the table, leaving the pair alone.

“No. Not really,” Octavius sighed. He waved at the three empty seats.

“What’d ya think?” Jed sat down with a grin.

“Think of what? You’ll have to be more specific.”

“The music? The band?”

“I have a sudden urge to buy a tractor.”

Jed laughed. “Not yer kind of music, huh?”

“Not really, no. But you sing very nicely,” Octavius allowed. He tried to ignore the little surge of happiness that welled up in response to Jed’s obvious delight.

Just then, a server appeared, setting down a drink in front of Octavius. Surprised, he looked up in confusion. “I’m sorry. I didn’t order anything else.”

“A guy bought it for you. That one, over there,” the server pointed to the far side of the bar. “I think his name was Lance or something. I wasn’t really listening to be honest. Want me to ask again?”

“No, that’s fine.” Octavius felt his cheeks heating up as Jed leaned over to stare at his mystery suitor. When the blond turned back around, there was a scowl on his face. Interesting. “Actually….”

“Rude!” Jed interrupted before Octavius could fully change his mind. He reached for the drink, downed a large sip and sat it back down at the end of the table. “Listen. Umm…. Could I have your number again?” He fished out his phone, opening to the contact entry screen.

Octavius’ heart leapt. He accepted the phone, concentrating on his typing so he wouldn’t have to look at Jed. “What happened to my note?”

“Victim to the hazards of being a waiter. It got damp somehow, and I couldn’t read the numbers anymore. All I could remember was the first three digits. Sorry, amigo.”

“It’s fine.” The words stuck in Octavius’ mouth. He handed the phone back to Jed who immediately began typing. Octavius was unsurprised to feel his phone vibrate with a text alert.

“Aren’t you going to check that?” Jed asked impatiently when Octavius continued to stare at him, purposely ignoring his phone.

“Mmm. No. It’s probably just Ahk. Locked in the bathroom or something,” Octavius replied casually. He just wanted to tease Jed to get a rise out of him, but the stricken look on the other man’s face was something he wasn’t expecting.

“Oh man! Your friends!” Jed blurted out, glancing around. “I wasn’t trying to take over your outing, honest! Uh, can you give them my thanks for lettin’ me talk to ya in private? I do appreciate it. I best be going, though. Check yer phone sometime, okay?”

“I shall. Good to see you, Not-Larry.” Octavius waited until Jed was out of sight before he checked his phone. When his friends finally returned, none of them questioned whether Octavius had scored a future date. His smile said it all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


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